When I was just a kid, I always anticipate the arrival of the Christmas season because for me it is the best time of the year.
I really don’t know but back then, when it’s Christmas, whenever I look up into an adult’s face, everyone I see is smiling and every house I see is beautiful even if they only have one Christmas lantern hanging on their window. I also think Christmas trees are magical trees that my family and I have to build out of plastic cellophane. Yes, our Christmas tree back then was a cut-out branch from a tree and we put white plastic cellophane so that it will have shiny leaves and then we put on the best Christmas lights ever and it magically transforms into this beautiful Christmas tree. From that moment on, I know I’m going to have the best Christmas in my life and I thought every Christmas would be as great as the last one. I was wrong.
Somehow, I don’t when but every time I see Christmas lights or hear Christmas carols being sang part of me is jumping for joy but another part of me is tremendously scared. I know I said I will forget everything bad that happened in the past and sayonara to that but I just can’t help it, it’s kind of a reflex thing that prepares me to what I will encounter this Christmas may it be good or bad.
But you know what, even if half of me is scared that Christmas is coming, the happy part of me somehow tells me that this Christmas is different from the last Christmas because it brings with it hope that maybe somehow I can get back the Happiness I felt every Christmas when I was young.