In the past, I’m very scared of bad experiences because I thought they don’t only hurt but the memories of those painful feelings linger and can even leave a nasty scar in my heart. However, right now I’m not so sure about it.
As I started reminiscing all that happened to me in the past what I remember the most are my happy times and though I can still remember all my sad memories it doesn’t really hurt anymore, it even made me grateful for if I wasn’t hurt, if I didn’t experience those terrible experiences, I wouldn’t be like this. What’s amazing about it is, when you look back in the past and you see those good and bad memories side by side. The sad memories can’t really hurt you anymore and surprisingly the beautiful memories have the ability to always make you smile and even make you laugh whenever you remember about them, and that my friends is the most important of all.
Some people might not believe me on this, but please trust me when I say “No matter how painful it is today, it will always get better”. At first, I hate looking in the past, I remembering those times when I was bullied for many painful school years. When my family went into financial difficulties and eventually to bankruptcy, when we found out my father is cheating, those when my heart got shattered into a million times, when I was betrayed by my best friend. I despised remembering those times, but eventually I reached a point in my life; no matter how long it took me, that when I remember those stuff I realized their the ones that lead me to finding new trustworthy friends, I got better in school because I want to prove to them they can’t shake me, my father as well as everyone in our family realized our mistakes and now we’ve gotten relatively closer. Our family might not be living the luxury we once have but we are so much happier than we are before. And most of all, I’ve changed for the better.
Don’t get me wrong it really took a while for me to realize everything but once a person reaches this stage of realization it makes you feel everything, the tears, the smiles, the frowns and even the laughter is all worth it. It’s like at first, your watching an artist painting and you can’t picture it out and then you immediately think it’s a piece of crap because you can’t understand it. However, when the artist is finish and you are able to see a masterpiece come out in the crap you saw before, you start to understand the reason for everything and then you get satisfied.
So now, I am going to say farewell to everything, I want to let go of my grudges, my doubts and my regrets because I understand my past now. I understand that the pains I had were nothing compared to the fun I experienced and without the pains, I wouldn’t have recognize happiness even if its staring right in front of me.
Sayonara to my bad experiences. I understand you now and I want to start another chapter in my life and wait for another masterpiece yet to be unfold in my life.